I have a confession to make. These past couple of years have been really difficult for me. And boy, am I ever thankful for that fact! I needed a time of refinement. By that, I mean that I really needed a period of time in which I was able to "not know" what I was doing, "not know" all of the answers, make mistakes, mess up...etc.
When I first left home for University, I fully looked at it as a means to an end, as a way to become a "real life grown-up", with not just a job, but a career. I looked at University as the next logical step to success, to moving forward towards a good future. There are so many aspects of University life that I didn't anticipate. Now, I'm not talking about the growing up in general that you do after high-school. That's a whole other topic for another day. After you graduate from high school, and you start moving forward into your 20’s, you are forced into many different circumstances that automatically cause growth and change in your life. It's inevitable. I'm specifically talking about the value of University, beyond the natural growth.
- You learn to think for yourself.
Thinking for yourself. What a concept. High school is a place where your teachers instruct you in each topic, often giving their own thoughts/opinions along the way. You are taught what the expected response is to each subject. In contrast, many University professors will present the many different sides of a topic, and facilitate discussion on it. I have gone entire semesters without once hearing my professor share where they stand on a particular issue, and I can't tell because they present all sides of the argument so effectively. As infuriating as that can be sometimes, it has been so valuable to be in an environment where you can freely debate issues and come to your own conclusions based on the facts. And when I say think for yourself, I mean critically examine the facts and act accordingly, based on your own convictions.
- You learn to discuss with respect.
This is a nice way of saying that you spend a lot of time in debate in University. You are in an environment, surrounded by people who disagree with you. And you are in no way prepared for this type of environment where that is ok. It's ok to respectfully disagree, as long as you have reasoning to back up your case. Even if you don't have a "set in stone" opinion on a particular subject, you can play devil’s advocate, you can ask critical questions, and you can help facilitate a diverse discussion.
- You learn that it's important to surround yourself with people who disagree with you.
This point goes along with number two. Growing up, we almost always surround ourselves with people that 'get' us. They agree with us on the important issues, and like the same activities as we do. Don't get me wrong, there is some value in surrounding yourself with supportive people who will affirm you along the way. However, intentionally seek out friendships with people who are not afraid of looking you in the eye and saying "I disagree." We, in North America, live in a society afraid of conflict. But once again, we learn so much more in the midst of those respectful disagreements, than if we were always agreeable. I have had some amazing discussions with people where I learned things about their perspective that I never would have by avoiding the conversation, or not respectfully allowing them to disagree with me.
- You learn to spend time in discovery/searching out an answer.
Sometimes, we get into the habit of faking it till we make it. (I'm incredibly guilty of this one). We can get really good at sounding as though we are knowledgeable on a subject, even though the reality is that we know very little. This can be very damaging, not to mention makes you look ignorant and arrogant when you're proven wrong. It's ok to say that you don't know much about a subject and ask questions of those who are more knowledgeable than you. You will gain respect by being honest about what you don't know, instead of acting in a way that implies that you think you know everything. Also by displaying that you've spent some time in researching a particular subject, you are effectively sending the message that you are someone worth listening to/reputable.
- You learn that it's good to be wrong sometimes.
Sometimes, we learn so much by being proven wrong. You spend a lot of time getting your mind blown during post-secondary education. There are times when you have to wrestle through the reality that what you've been taught growing up, or what you always assumed to be true growing up, is not actually the whole truth. Also, when you write something in your paper, or say something in class discussion that is completely untrue, it is those moments where you can learn the most. It forces you to seek out the true answer.